At the wedding reception, Strudel walked past Strawberry and Pancake, who had matching dresses, except Strawberry's was pink and Pancake's was green.
"Wow, Pancake, you look amazing" Strudel said.

"You stay away from my girl" Gepetto came out of nowhere, and put his arm around Pancake.

Strudel sighed, and walked into an empty room, that had only a shelf lined with alcohol.

"Hey" a voice startled him.
Muffins came out of a corner, a bottle of Jim Bean in his hand. "What are you doing here?"

"Pancake looks so beautiful" Strudel whispered, and slid down against the wall.

Muffins handed Strudel the bottle.

Strudel took a sip. "Strawberry looks beautiful too" he said softly.

"Strawberry is beautiful" Muffins agreed. "So is Pancake"

"You got to have sex with Strawberry" Strudel said. "And I dated her for like, ever"

"Man, you guys were so young" Muffins said. "You got to have sex with Pancake, AND you've made out with the both of them"

"True" Strudel half smiled.

"Strawberry is an amazing kisser" Muffins sighed.

"How did she kiss you?" Strudel asked.

"What?"

"I mean," Strudel said. "Was it like this?"
He kissed Muffins gently on the lips, and even though he was wasted, Muffins was creeped out and had his eyes wide open. "I'm not-" Muffins started, but Strudel interrupted.

"Or was it a little more like this?" he grabbed Muffins' face and kissed him a bit more passionately.

Muffins downed some more whiskey. "Definitely the second one"

Strudel kissed him again. "You're probably gonna say no..." he started. "But-"

"But what?" Muffins polished off the bottle and grabbed a bottle of tequila.

"Do you-" Strudel stuttered. "Do you want to get a hotel room for the night?"

Muffins took another big swig. "Sure" he slurred. "We've gotta stop at the gift shop first, though"

"Why?"

"This is embarrassing" Muffins said. "But I'm taking antibiotics for syphillis, so we're gonna need some condoms"

"How did you get syphillis?" Strudel looked worried.

"Unprotected sex with Lemonade" Muffins mumbled. "Probably one of the stupidest things I could do"

Strudel started giggling.

"How is that funny?" Muffins shouted.

"I had unprotected sex with that whore, too" Strudel chuckled. "If you got syphilis, I probably did, too. So I'll worry about getting treated in a few days. Let's go get the room now, that way we can start having fun as soon as the reception is over"

mhmm